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Tuesday, 4 December 2012

Charlie Fizzle's Filling Big Shoe's !

               For all of you who have read my previous post's will know about , my Rottweiler Fizz who had Bone Cancer, she finally went, to the Rainbow Bridge on the 20th September 2011, this date is when part of me died. The incredible spirit and courage that my Fizzly showed everyone, who met her no~matter for how short a time, that she was a amazing dog and one that you would never forget. 

             Her total acceptance to her illness, Amputation and Chemotherapy showed everyone, how truly amazing a Rottweiler could be !  My Fizzly and I had this totally unique relationship, and we could talk to each other without saying a word ......... Fizz was my place to go to when I felt sad or upset. She would never need an explanation as to what is wrong and what's upset me, My Fizzly would just sit by my side and put ........

 

Her Right  Foot on top of my  Left  Foot,  and just be there ........

         
         This little boy had a huge void to fill as the Loss of My Fizzle's had and still does,  leave me totally bereft and if I'm honest, I don't think I will ever get over her.  The bond that we shared was a completely symbiotic one, and we lived for each other.  Before she passed I had decided to keep, a little girl from Milly's Litter,  Milly had 2 Beautiful Babies that I could have picked from, and I would have loved either of these precious little Bundles of trouble.

This was Molly one of the 2 Girls <3 

                 But I then decided that because my Fizzly had Bone Cancer, that I would hold off on having a puppy and keep one from another litter. I decided this because I wanted to spend my time with Fizzles,  and to keep a puppy would have taken up my time,  I wanted to devote my whole being to my Fizzles. She had been through so much already with the Amputation, and 3 bouts of Chemotherapy, so having her as my main concern, was of higher importance than a puppy.

           So we found two wonderful homes for Molly and Treacle, and they went to their new home's the first week of September, and I planned to donate my time to Fizzly. This was when this world dealt me it's Cruellest Blow of all, my Fizzly started going down hill rapidly.  Her final battle was one that we couldn't survive, and even though it broke my heart, when she told me that she was too tired to continue fighting.

           I accepted her choice as we had always known, what each other was thinking, and I knew that she was staying alive for me,  and me alone ...........  I was not even closely ready for her to leave me, and I don't think that any time would have worked for me ....... apart from NEVER ......... 

           But when I asked her if she had had enough, and she turned away from me and tried to hide herself,  into the corner of her room avoiding my eye's  ......... I knew that NEVER wouldn't be allowed.

        I just said Ok I understand and if you have had enough then its ok with me .........  She then turned around and started licking my tears, and just lay down next to me and I knew that the day had come.  This is when my Fizzle's had just had enough,  it was the worst day of my life and a moment that I will remember forever.  I don't think I will ever recover from her loss, because she was my heart and soul, and we were totally connected and I miss her more and more each day ........... 
                                  FILM LINK   Fizzly and Ben on her last day 

This was My Fizzly and Ben on the day she decided that her Battle,

                                             had come to it's end. 

          The love that Fizz had for my children led her, to hide her true feelings of pain, having made the decision that she wanted to end her battle. When Ben and Emma would leave the room,  Fizz would just lie down next to me in obvious pain and tiredness. But when they would come into her room, she would immediately pull herself up,  and would act like she was doing just fine,  as you can see from the film of Ben and Fizz together.

         This show's us just how truly amazing  My Fizzly was, Even when in serious pain her love for my children, was of higher importance to Fizzly than her own suffering.  This was exactly why my Fizzly had such an impression on everyone,  she was just incredible and was a prime example of what a Rottweiler truly is. If more people saw a  TRUE  ROTTWEILER  then they would never be seen as the Dangerous Breed again.

        The loss of Fizz left a deep hole in my life, and the need to fill this void,  this was the real reason why I got my Charlie, it was not so he can become the Stud Dog of all ages !  I got Charlie to help me recover ....... from the devastating Loss of My Fizzle's.  This Huge undertaking of this really small puglet was mountainous, and a job that I'm sure he had no reckoning, when he was picked by me, from his litter of 5 brother's and Sister's. 

               But I knew from the moment that I first picked him up, that he was the Puglet that would be up to this unbelievable Challenge :)  He was the smallest of all the boys, and as I wanted a " Chunky Monkey " he was not the puppy, that I had asked his breeder to keep to one side. Even though he was not the puppy, that we had travelled so far  for,  to become our new family member, once I picked him up I just knew, that he was the one for me !  

             He may have been the smallest boy of the Litter, but this don't affect his character,  and he was probably the most out going of the litter. He also showed the absolute joy of being snuggled, and as he wiggled himself into my neck, he had caught me hook line and Puglet. We had no name for this lil bundle yet, so when we were asked about,  what his Pedigree name should be.  The only thing I knew for certain, was that his name had the word " Fizz "  in it ~ Somewhere .........

                     The hardest thing that I had to do that day, was leaving this little Bundle of Blackness behind, as he was still to young to leave his mummy. We had to wait another 2 weeks before, we could return and pick him up, and I'm not known for my patience, so 14 days is an awfully long time !!    But I was basically dragged out of the house by Dai and Emma,   and after squeezing my Puglet  Goodbye and taking    " Oh just a few more pictures !! "

      I eventually found myself back in the car,  and still  Minus my Puglet ......... :( 

                               Charlie and His Brother's !

          Well the 2 weeks eventually passed and we had picked his name, so his Pedigree name is Charles Fizz , named after my special girl. We travelled up to collect him and Oh My he was Soooo Cute , and I don't think he as any idea of the Big Shoe's that,  he would have to fill.  My main problem was that this little boy was so small,  so small in fact that we had to buy him a Cat Collar ! We also included a bell as I was so scared, I would lose him in the long Grass,  or that a Buzzard may have flown off with him !! 

          I don't know if my Charlie has any idea of the job that he was brought into .......but he has done this job really well !! He is the happiest little boy around and he's a definite Mummies Boy,  and is totally spoilt as Dai and the children will attest too :)  Charlie may not know how much he has helped me,  and how his little personality has helped to take away,  some of the pain of the loss of Fizzly.

        Charlie seems to have in some part, the ability to know,  when I'm feeling low and when I'm not feeling that good,  or hurting more than normal.  He will come and sit with me and just snuggle,  or he will do something funny to make me smile or laugh. He also has some traits of Fizzles he's calm,  and has this ability to make everyone fall in love with him, because he's so cute. 

       Charlie settled in our home as if he had always been here, and the girls accepted him instantly. I don't know if Fizzly had a part in getting Charlie into my life, but he has helped me to recover,  and he has a awful lot of Fizzly's traits,  which is funny when you think that he's a Pug,  and Fizz was a Rottweiler !! But he has had an ulcer,  in one of his eyes which has since recovered, but as he is only 10 months old, he was absolutely brilliant at the vets.

       The treatment and tests for a puppy of his age,  and the amount of Pain he must have been in, he was remarkable and so good,  that they stated that Oh he's just like Fizz. To be honest,  he was he just sat there, and allowed them to do what they wanted, and he just accepted everything calmly, and with a Brilliant attitude just like my Fizzles. Charlie has this way of looking at things, around the place and its like Oh I've seen this or been here before ?? 

      Now I'm not saying that Fizzly has reincarnated herself into a lil Black Slug ~ but he seems to understand how I'm feeling, and when I'm low and he will just sit by me or on my lap, and just be there until I feel better :) 

     But the thing that I cannot understand or explain,  is that when he is standing or sitting by me .......... He will stand or sit next to me and,

His Right front foot will always be found, on top of my Left Foot,


         Now that is something that no~one can explain  or Ignore ...............

       So I can't say that Charlie has filled the Gap left by Fizzly's Passing ....... but he has definitely made me feel a whole lot better. I will never get over losing Fizzly, but I can at least talk about her,  and smile at memories and this,  I feel is down Partly to a Little Black Slug.  Who has just by being himself,  begun to fill some seriously  Huge  Rottweiler  Paw  Prints  and he's done it very well  :)






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